A friend of mine loves the ocean, she has a big heart for mother nature and she loves sea so much. We share that love together, however my love is not as great as hers and the intensity didn't quite level in. I love the ocean, as far as I can remember, since childhood. I was born in a slum area near the sea, 1982 til 1990s the sea was still clear blue back then. I love to swim, nobody taught me, my uncles just threw me out into the water and I learned to swim because of fear- fear of going down- to the bottom of the sea.
It all started there, I wake up in the morning looking down at the serene sea. It was my garden, my playground and merry go around. I learned boating, diving because the sea provided me those. Until one day we left, i left my playground and it was sudden, my mom decided to move because drugs became rampant in our place. My mom doesn't want us to grow with the environment that it will become, I was 7 years old then. I don't know any other games because we play hide n seek in the water even catch me. We race, sing, and simply swim.
Then my mom died after a year, it was painful- it was almost unbearable. After another year we went back to where we all started, but the place was never the same. It became ruthless and people fear to enter the place..
My beloved sea turned into murky swamp, so sad, my playground is where my grandpa and I loves to swim and it's all gone. I wept for awhile but not for long, I was tired of weeping for things that will never comeback or so i thought.
I still go to the ocean once in a while, a far ocean, a commercialized one. I still go to my birthplace but everytime I come to visit my playground I still feel pain in my heart. I can go to other playgrounds and gardens but mine is no longer alive and I know I can't touch it or even smell it. I didn't even realize until now that I didn't care anymore, I feel guilty and pained more.
I know I can no longer save my garden but I still can save others and much greater ones...
I miss the ocean, I miss the coolness it gives me. Its embrace never fails to tell me, 'You belong here".
